Weight of Living

Weight of Living- 36x36 in acrylic on stretch canvas.

Inspired by two songs from a band named Bastille Weight of Living part 1&2. Often my biggest regret is I'm not the mom my kids deserve because of my handicaps. Yet I also understand that "I do not deserve to be sick either." This is the cards we are dealt. Painting helps me let go of the burdens that are simple unfixable.

More personal story. The piece being painted was an earlier work. It was completed after a family trip to the Cape Cod. We beached an then roamed the artist community. By dinner the pain and fatigue was visible. Over all it was a good day for the family.

Yet for me the entire trip was a struggle. The drive killed my back, the sand was so soft I was physical unable to walk or stand. And I spent the next week in bedridden.
When the flare had subsided "Hidden pain" was were I purged the pain. To enjoy what little time and energy was left.

As a parent we give our children everything we can. Every resources we have avaible sometimes sacrificing ourselves. We do it all because we love them.

My handicaps will always be here we must. Learning to adapt is an everyday family struggle. Painting cuts my soul free from its Weight of Living.